Police protection?

Here's a driving tip for non-Portuguese residents and visitors using any kind of motorised vehicle in the Algarve: don't get stopped by the police!

The traffic cops here are the BT/GNR (Brigada de Trânsito of the Guarda Nacional Republicana). And guess what? They don't like "rich foreigners". As usual with public services, they are overworked and underpaid, so I cannot blame them at all being pissed off most of the time. But it stills hurts when you get on the wrong end of them.

A few months back I was riding in medium traffic on the EN125 (a main east-west road here in the Algarve). A few cars ahead of me were two traffic cops on bikes. One of them was riding in a way that can only be described as "like a jerk". He was weaving his bike from side to side, standing up on the foot pegs, slowing down to a crawling pace then speeding up again. The driver of the car immediately behind him was obviously in distress, not knowing what to do with this lunatic clowning around in front of him. I watched in amazement as this guy committed a string of motoring offences, any one of which would have rightfully got ME in trouble if I'd done it front of HIM.

Finally, I lost my cool: I pulled alongside him and made a hand gesture that suggested he was not setting a good example to other road-users. In three seconds they had their flashing lights on, sirens going, and had pulled me over. I was then subjected to a very aggressive inspection of my documents (together with an absolute refusal to speak Portuguese slowly enough for me to understand them). Unfortunately, the insurance certificate I had with me had expired and the new one was still on my desk in my office. They (gleefully) escorted me to the police station and then took two hours to issue a simple fine. During this time I was warned, in no uncertain terms, against making any official complaint. After finally being released, I decided to let it slide: life's too short and all that.

Two weeks later, I was pulled over by a roadside random check team. I'd forgotten to switch on the headlight of my bike: an offence, even for a bike bigger than some Japanese hatchbacks and at midday on a clear sunny day. They fined me 60 Euros on the spot. If I hadn't happened to have 60 Euros in my wallet, they would have confiscated the bike.

Enough! The next day I went to the police station and asked to see the boss. How come, I asked him, I can witness 6000 traffic violations per hour when I'm out on the road and yet rarely see anyone being pulled over for the most heinous infractions? How come I can see beaten up old Zundapps on the road with no brake lights, no front or rear lights and completely bald tyres? How come I have to close the front windows of my apartment at night to block out the revving engines and screeching tyres of the nocturnal "tuning" morons, without ever seeing one being chased by a police car? How come all of this and then it's ME, a responsible motorist with 25 years bike and car experience, that can pick up 200 Euros of fines in two weeks for... what? For nothing important!

He was a polite, well-educated man and he listened in quiet amazement to my complaint that the greatest part of my offences was to have been "a rich foreigner". He asked me to identify the officers involved in the first incident. He explained to me that he was shorted-staffed, under-budgeted, etc. Would he refund my fines? No. Could he assure me that such injustices would not occur again? No.

Was it a satisfactory ending for me? Not really, but I'm glad I complained. Somebody should.